What We Learned This Week

This Week Was Most Unusual Because We Had A 2-Day Holiday On Tuesday Cum Wednesday ( This only happens once in 76 years just like Halley’s comet ). Anyways, It Wasn’t Too Short For Us To Learn Our Lessons. Below Are Some Of The Lessons We Learned This Week.
1. The Boko Haram Is A Fun Club : I Mean How Else Could You Explain There Recent Actions And Declarations. Last Week, I Was Practically Moaning About Them And Their Wants But They Mailed Me When Their Spokesman ( who be the guy sef ) Declared Their Intentions. The Guy ‘Claimed’ ( i dunno if he’s even related to them) That Their Relatives And Friends Must Be Released From Prison Else They’ll Stage More Attacks. This Prompted Me To Put Forward Two Theories About Them. Its Either These Guys Are Lesser Humans That Broke Away From ‘Us’ In The Last Thousand Years Of Evolution And Still Retained Their Bestial Brain And Wits. The Only Problem With This Theory Is Their Choice Of Weapons. Bombs Weren’t In Use In The Stone Age. Alternatively, I Think They’re Are Just A Bunch Of Pranksters Having A Go At The Government. This 2nd Theory Is Better Joo !!!
2. Exorcism Is The Best Method Of Casting Out Demons :
Don’t Believe What Those Scientists Tell You About Exorcism Being Fetish And Inhuman But I Say Unto Ye ‘Take A Cue From Sir Alex And Carry Out Exorcism For The Good Of All’ ( I Didn’t Say Anything About 8-2 Ohh ). You’ll Agree With Me That Exorcism Still Works !
3. Lil Wayne > Jay Z : Now Keep Cool Fellas ! I Know This Is Crazy ( just like Hurricane irene. Bet y b say women dey disturb us ? Remember eve ? ) But I’m Not Talking About Stuffs Of About A Decade Ago ( 10 years ago, lil bow bow popular pass lil wayne then sef and eedris was the best rapper in 9ja ). Recently, Lil Wayne Has Racked Up More Number Ones, Sold More Copies, Featured More, And Is Ranked Higher. This Week Alone, He’s Sold More Copies Of ‘The Carter IV’ Than Jay Z + Kanye West’s ‘Watch The Throne’. Like He Said ” Its A Wayne’s World, Ya’ll Just Some Tourists”.
4. The Mayans Are Correct May Be Correct : Ever Heard About The Mayans ? O.k I Know You’re So Myopic But You Should Have Seen The Movie 2012. You Haven’t ? Kill Yourself Now ! ( some people commit suicide for reasons less reasonable *winks* ). Anyways, These Guys Postulated That The World Will End In 2012. Although I’m Not Allowed To Believe Them (i’m a moslem remember ?), I’m Starting To Pay Attention To Them Since Hurricane Irene And The Ibadan Rain. If The World Ever Ends, Let It Be Known That I Still Hate @sir_hayub, @rhymemarvel, @calm_lolly, @kemmiiii, and the rest of Ya’ll.
CIAO ! *waving*
P.S : the ibadan rain no plenty reach Lagos own, more people died because ibadan people mumu pass lagos people. *mocking laugh*

What We Learned This Week

This Week Started On A ‘Not So Great’ Note ( if you start your week waiting for our brothers in the lord PHCN to justify their price tag, then you’ll understand what fuckery is) . We Started Off With Prof Sofola And Ended With Prof ( ?) Oshinubi (Dr Samuel Ditched Us, That Woman !) . I Have Listed Below The Stand Out Moments Of The Week. Enjoy !
1. It Is More Important To Check Into The Biochem Lab Just To Write Attendance : Yeah, The New Trend Is To Write Your Name And Zoom Off. If You’re Stubborn Enough To Carry Out The Experiment, Then You’ll Be Marked Absent #sweardown !
Roll Call
2. Don’t Tell Lil Wayne Any Of Your Secrets : Yes Ohh ! Its No More News That Lil Wayne’s Carter 4 Has Been Leaked. I Strongly Think It Is Due To The Fact That Lil Wayne Couldn’t Keep His Mouth Shut !
3. The Boko Haram Sect Don Get Liver : The Recent Attack On The UN HQ In Abuja Means Only One Thing, The’re Really Serious ! ( what do dey want sef ?) Dose Bastards Ruining Our Image
4. The Biochem Department Is A Joke Club : Yeah I Said It ! First They Brought A Guy Barely Audible, Then A Guy Who Doesn’t Even Know The Periodic Table. Now They Are Planning To Kill Us Off With A Joker ( The Dude Is Provocatively Not Funny !)
Guess What ? Next Week Is Even Going To Be Better ! The Moslems Will Be Celebrating Come Tuesday Or Wednesday And The Anatomy C.A Too !
Ciao !